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Senator Hubris Calms the Deniers

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Senator Hubris Calms the Deniers

Hubris leaned back in his plush chair with both hands politely resting upon his large stomach and without leaning forward asked the visiting constituent, “And what can your government do for you today, young man?”
“Oh senator,” the man rested both hands against the large desk, “Deniers are thwarting our plans to save the planet.”
“Please, take a seat, Mister…ah…”
“Professor Partisan,” the man took a seat.
“Would you like some water?” Hubris asked. “It is becoming a rare commodity, you know.”
“Yes, thank you,” the teacher accepted a tall glass of iced water from Hubris’ attentive secretary.
“You are having a problem with, ah, deniers, you say?” Hubris projected a petite scowl from his visage and his jowls shuddered in harmony.
“Yes, they are infiltrating logic and science into various publications and some of our students are actually reading them,” the professor’s dismay was clearly apparent. Our man caused global warming claims are being challenged using scientific investigation and analysis. We can’t let this continue. Isn’t there some law we can pass to silence these environmentology experts?”
“I thought reading and objective analysis is banned in your school unless approved by dean, uh, what’s his name – you know, the ex-terrorist?” Hubris pursed his lips in thought.
“The dean approves appropriate material to be taught but he cannot disparage free speech outside the university,” Partisan shook his head.
“Of course he can,” Hubris objected. “We disparage opposing thoughts and smear anyone who contradicts our scientific analysis and view of history all the time. Say, you had better drink some of that water before the ice melts and spills water all over the desk.”
The professor gulped some of the water, “Thanks but too many people and even some of our alumni are not paying attention to our smears. We have accused those analysts of racism, white privilege, class warfare, homophobia, and stupidity to no avail. We put them in league with our slaver founding fathers and identified them with the pilgrims who terrorized the natives to build an evil nation. We even smeared them as being religious zealots.”
“Christians?” Hubris wondered out loud.
“Of course,” Partisan replied in exasperation.
“Sounds appropriate,” Hubris leaned forward now, clearly attentive to the plight of the partisan professor. “Why isn’t that sufficient? Always worked in the past.”
“One of their pundits is a black, gay, female, secular scientist who refuses to respond to our personal accusations and keeps putting out facts,” Partisan nodded before taking another gulp of water. An ice cube slipped in the drink and a small wave dribbled from the glass unto his chin. “She has written observations and performed scientific examinations that demonstrate we are lying and some students have decided to actually do some of their own analysis on the raw data. The situation is getting so critical, several teachers have been seen reading science books and taking notes. Can you imagine the controversy that could result from an actual analysis of factual scientific measurements?”
“Don’t worry,” Hubris sat back in his chair, resuming his prior position. “A few students may decide to read and perform analysis but most citizens don’t read technical jargon, and they are too indolent and inexperienced to perform actual analysis. Our version of facts will deny the majority of any actual scientific reports.”
“How can you be so positive we can deny concrete science and analysis?” Partisan looked unconvinced.
“We have been successful for years,” Hubris became condescending. “We have denied the truth about candidates, weather, employment, debt, taxes, energy, and education. We have actually changed history and condemned our forefathers. Our resulting power over the masses is reflected by our control of the media and, of course, the schools, where every student is subjected to our version of liberal concepts and history.”
“Except for several journals and Fax news,” Partisan disagreed with his senator.
“They are a minority.” Hubris nodded acquiescence, “A thorny minority, to be sure. We fight them every day and it is only a matter of time until we convince, demean, or corrupt them. I look forward to the day when every citizen will be free to do what we progressives direct.”
“But what about the actual scientific facts concerning man caused global warming?”
“Just keep denying them and they will go away,” Hubris smiled.

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Written by poyhonen

May 19, 2015 at 2:49 am

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